When the Italian Gianni Rodari came up with his poem “What do crafts smell like?”, All professions for the population Soviet Union were equal. No wonder it was in the Union that this verse became the personification of a working man with the smell of not perfume, but gasoline, medicine, engine oil or muffin. After all, then the cult of working specialties was promoted!

What did Gianni Rodari write about?

Having gained popularity as a writer in the Soviet Union, J. Rodari published many interesting children's fairy tales and stories. And most of them sing of the work of the working man. How could the profession of an actress or movie star have a pleasant smell? Does an engineer smell good? Maybe the pilot has a pleasant aroma? According to the ideology of communism, only a person has the right to be significant. Of course, the writer sincerely trusted these principles. The popular nursery rhyme by G. Rodari “What do crafts smell like” in our changed reality has somewhat lost its ideological orientation, although the smells of working professions have remained practically the same:

• the glazier smells of window putty;
• doctor - medicine;
• the fisherman smelled of a slave;
• the carpenter gives out the smell of chips;
• the businessman smells of expensive cologne;
• the business woman smells of French perfume;
• money, as the well-known truth says, does not smell.

Is it possible to choose a profession by the smell that accompanies it?

When choosing a professional occupation, it is worth getting acquainted with the smells that

associated with one or the other. Indeed, in the poem “What Crafts Smell” it is clearly stated that every profession has a smell. It may turn out that, despite obvious successes in business, a particular aroma can cause unpleasant emotions, which, in turn, can affect mood and performance. So, some features of professions associated with smells:

• If a person likes the aromas of spices, he can become a good cook.
• Do you like fruity and floral scents? Such an individual likes to be in the spotlight, you can try yourself as a public speaker (actor, lecturer, teacher).
• Professionals working in fields related to human health should adequately treat the aromas of mint and anise.
• If since childhood you like the smell of fresh newspapers and magazines, you should try yourself as an editor.
• The smell of coffee will help the realtor in his difficult case.
• A sports coach personifies cheerfulness and excellent sports form. Its aroma has a pronounced citrus bouquet.

Some professions with specific smells

• Who compares which cat food tastes better? A pet food taster, of course! This specialist feels all the subtleties of the differences in taste and aroma of the new food. When J. Rodari wrote his poem “What do crafts smell like”, there was no such profession yet.
• Deer breeders earn hundreds of thousands of dollars annually by selling deer urine to hunters. The pheromones contained in this "product" are an excellent bait. When it comes to big money, you can forget about smells.
• The number of roads in the world is increasing every year. Vehicle speeds have also increased. Accordingly, the number of animals knocked down on the roads also does not decrease. Who keeps the pavement clean? Not very prestigious, but rather well-paid job of a collector of dead animals, the poem "What do crafts smell like" does not describe.

Pros of "smelling" professions

Not every person can connect his life with a huge number of pleasant or unpleasant aromas, when communication with smells becomes a daily duty. The main "tool" of the taster - the nose - is a very delicate device. The profession of a perfume taster or requires a special approach to your health. Of course, even now it is impossible to do without the professions that are listed in the poem “What do crafts smell like?” The verse was written during the era of wholesale socialism, when some concepts were turned upside down in accordance with the requirements of those years. You can change a lot in the life of countries and continents. Only the properties of the human organism are constant. Having the right information, it is easier to choose a business to your liking.

Contact with smells can enrich or poison a person's life. Each profession has a certain flavor. If you don’t like the smell of the profession, maybe the appropriate payment compensates for this shortcoming?

NORTH-WESTERN FEDERAL DISTRICT

2. Vologda region
Three police officers raped the girl several times in one evening - at the entrance to the monastery, at a construction site and in front of the regional court building.

3. Kaliningrad region
The traffic police officer caused the woman a concussion by hitting her with a barrier on the head.

4. Leningrad region
The policeman, who was awarded the medal "For Distinction in the Protection of Public Order", incited hatred towards Jews and representatives of Caucasian nationalities through LiveJournal, without hiding his name and occupation.

5. Murmansk region
The head of the criminal investigation department, investigating the disappearance of a person, together with the relatives of the missing person, kidnapped another person, locked him in a garage and threatened him to confess to a murder that he did not commit.

6. Nenets autonomous region
The pensioner of the Ministry of Internal Affairs shot the employees of a psychiatric clinic with a gun, wanting to take revenge on his mistress, who worked there, out of jealousy.

7. Novgorod region
The policeman tracked down the suspect, who made an insulting anonymous call to the helpline of the Internal Affairs Directorate, forcibly forced him to eat two shoulder straps, a condom and drink it all down with this urine.

8. Pskov region
On the eve of May 9, a drunken policeman smashed tombstones, broke crosses and desecrated eleven graves in the city cemetery, including those of war veterans.

9. Republic of Karelia
A drunken policeman in the company of three friends from the village of Chupa lynched an acquaintance who allegedly damaged their hunting lodge.

10. Komi Republic
The policeman beat a minister of the Evangelical Lutheran Church of Ingria, shouting that "he serves in a sect, that Russia is a healthy body, and his church is pus on the body of Russia, and that there is only one correct church - Orthodox."

11. St. Petersburg
Special Investigator Woman important matters The police department of St. Petersburg forged official documents and “stole” from the pre-trial detention center a recidivist thief with whom she was in love.



12. Belgorod region
The head of the regional traffic police united the computers of the car registration unit and the company of his wife, who worked in the ATC building and helped motorists fill out documents, into one network, underestimating engine power.

13. Bryansk region
The traffic police inspector caught up with a pedestrian who accidentally pushed him, sprayed tear gas in his face, beat him and left.

14. Vladimir region
The traffic police inspector knocked down a cyclist to death, hid her body in a roadside ditch, and then, together with his colleagues, took part in the search for the criminal for several days.

15. Voronezh region
The policeman turned out former director a dairy factory who took a job with the police to escape accusations of non-payment wages to their employees.

16. Ivanovo region
The head of the department for the investigation of tax crimes of the regional Department of Internal Affairs offered the businessman to teach him for 1 million rubles how to behave during the investigation of a criminal case for non-payment of taxes.

17. Kaluga region
The head of the district department of internal affairs forced the prisoner, who was serving a three-day sentence for an administrative offense, to make repairs in his wife's apartment.

18. Kostroma region
The deputy head of the district police department got into a fight with the prosecutor because of official disagreements that arose during the inspection of the crime scene, and then tried to set fire to his car.

20. Lipetsk region
The sergeant of the patrol service stole a cutlet from a visitor to the wine glass "Charka" and fled.

21. Moscow
The policeman accidentally shot his partner, imitating computer game, which they had recently played in the recreation room in the building of the prosecutor's office of the Central Administrative District of Moscow.

22. Moscow region
The policemen kidnapped the gypsy, hid him in the White Pillars psychiatric clinic and demanded a ransom from his camp - 150 thousand dollars.

23. Oryol region
The traffic inspector himself paid fictitious fines for crossing the street in the wrong place, which he wrote out for random persons from the traffic police database.

24. Ryazan region
During a street quarrel, the deputy head of the city police department shot an 18-year-old student in the temple, demanding an apology from him for the alleged insult.

25. Smolensk region
A retired investigator from Smolensk, in response to a demand to hand over his official ID, tried to eat it, but could not chew the crust and managed to swallow only his photograph with a seal.

26. Tambov region
The police officers, having received a report of a family quarrel, came to the aid of a villager who complained about her husband, and beat them both in front of their children.

27. Tver region
Drunken policemen - father and son - tried to shoot fellow villagers from a hunting rifle and a traumatic pistol, taking revenge on them for complaints about their behavior.

28. Tula region
A police lieutenant colonel beat to death an oncologist surgeon who accidentally crushed his domestic thoroughbred pigeon with his car.

29. Yaroslavl region
A policeman killed a homeless man suspected of stealing milk.

SOUTHERN FEDERAL DISTRICT

31. Volgograd region
Patrol officers beat a man to death who crossed the road at a red light.

32. Krasnodar Territory
Due to “low self-esteem and hatred of society”, a policeman shot five homeless people, his younger brother, and, together with a local television operator, blew up nine improvised explosive devices on the streets of Sochi.

33. Republic of Adygea
The policeman organized a shop for the production of counterfeit vodka at his home, bottling 250 liters of water with alcohol on his own.

34. Republic of Kalmykia
A district police officer from Kalmykia kidnapped a loader at the Astrakhan market and sold him to Kalmyk shepherds in the nearest village for 2,000 rubles.

35. Rostov region
An employee of the criminal investigation department created two gangs of recidivist thieves and robbed his neighbors - he took away orders from war veterans, newspapers from postmen and money from entrepreneurs.

NORTH CAUCASUS FEDERAL DISTRICT

36. Kabardino-Balkarian Republic
The policeman, having learned that his friend had sold the apartment, took her to the forest, doused her with gasoline and burned her alive.

37. Karachay-Cherkess Republic
The policeman independently and arbitrarily cut down 240 Christmas trees and, together with his partner-recidivist, tried to take them out of the forest to sell them in the Krasnodar Territory.

38. Republic of Dagestan
Two policemen killed each other in an altercation that escalated into a shootout after one policeman stopped the car of the other for a check.

39. Republic of Ingushetia
A policeman, while interrogating the owner of an opposition website as a witness, mortally wounded him with an “accidental shot in the head” from a pistol belonging to the head of the personal bodyguard of the President of Ingushetia.

40. Republic of North Ossetia-Alania
During a quarrel with a district police officer from Chechnya, a patrol policeman from Ingushetia wounded a resident of the North Ossetian Mozdok in the stomach with a ricocheted bullet.

41. Chechen Republic
A policeman, due to careless handling of a Kalashnikov assault rifle, killed one person and wounded another at the wedding of his friend.

42. Stavropol Territory
Under torture, the police forced the teenager to confess to the murder of his sister, who turned out to be alive, and sent him for compulsory treatment to a psychiatric clinic for three years.

43. Kirov region
The policeman appropriated and sold 22 railroad rails seized as material evidence in a criminal case on rail theft.

44. Nizhny Novgorod region
Policemen tortured the man by putting a bag filled with beer on his head and then tried to drown him in the Volga for being "bald" and "too healthy".

45. Orenburg region
The policemen refused to accept complaints about cell phone thefts and referred victims to the private detective agency of a former policeman who was in cahoots with a cell phone company security officer (also a former policeman).

46. ​​Penza region
Policemen dressed in civilian clothes, without warning or explanation, opened fire on the ataman of the Cossack army in the forest and during the shootout killed him with a shot in the back: he began to shoot back, deciding that he was ordered by business competitors.

47. Perm region
A police ensign stole 3,000 jewels and jewelry left on the bodies of the victims of the plane crash that occurred in Perm in September 2008.

48. Republic of Bashkortostan
The traffic police inspector did not like the stalled motor scooter left on the road, so he smashed it with a hammer and screwdriver, and then poured sand into the gas tank while the retired owner was looking for a tugboat in the nearest village.

49. Republic of Mari El
For a large bribe, the policemen of the pre-trial detention center organized the escape of two convicts, allowing them to dig an underground passage from the cell to the outside.

50. Republic of Mordovia
A patrol officer caught up with an oncoming car and beat its driver because he, in his opinion, blinded him with headlights.

51. Republic of Tatarstan
A drunken policeman beat a random passerby for an hour because he "did not salute him on the Day of the Criminal Investigation".

52. Republic of Udmurtia
A drunken policeman threw a stun grenade into the club, which he brought from a business trip to Chechnya, and wounded 16 children because he was not allowed to go to the disco.

53. Republic of Chuvashia
A traffic police officer beat a man for riding a horse onto the dance floor of a disco that was held outdoors on the territory of the recreation center.

54. Samara region
A policeman, along with two unemployed friends, stole a cow from the barn of a livestock farm.

55. Saratov region
The police forced the man to take out a loan to pay them a bribe.

56. Ulyanovsk region
Forensic experts from the city police department beat a man half to death, who prevented them from buying vodka without a queue at the Sovremennik cafe.

57. Kurgan region
Policemen beat a man who asked them to stop swearing.

58. Sverdlovsk region
The policeman stole a TV from the apartment in the presence of the owners, explaining to them that he was acting "in the interests of the investigation."

59. Tyumen region
The policeman of the Tyumen airport "Roshchino" illegally created his own cargo airline during his service.

60. Chelyabinsk region
A policeman and his unemployed drug addict friend killed two hikers in the woods, who asked them to be quiet and stop shooting empty bottles with a gun.

61. Khanty-Mansi Autonomous Okrug
The head of the traffic police department, in order to improve his performance on administrative offenses, installed 24 fake road signs on the Surgut-Salekhard road and deprived 11 people of their rights

62. Yamalo-Nenets Autonomous Okrug
A drunken policeman got angry when he heard on May 9 how a girl passing by sings a song on English language, and opened fire from a traumatic pistol on the playground.

SIBERIAN FEDERAL DISTRICT

63. Altai Territory
The deputy head of the regional Center for Combating Extremism gave the arms dealer a hand grenade, a hand grenade fuse and an explosive.

64. Trans-Baikal Territory
Policemen, investigating cases of loss of livestock, themselves stole two mother sheep and raped the first residents of the village of Yuzhnoye they met with a truncheon and shoe polish.

65. Krasnoyarsk Territory
The head of the practical assistance department of the operational response department of the regional police department illegally released a murder suspect from the pre-trial detention center and took him home to visit his wife.

66. Irkutsk region
Under the guise of special operations to combat the drug mafia, police officers robbed private houses and apartments: they broke open doors, shot at windows, fired tear gas and took out everything of value.

67. Kemerovo region
The head of the department for combating economic crimes of the Department of Internal Affairs for Prokopyevsk was warned in advance about police checks of miners who illegally extract coal.

68. Novosibirsk region
A traffic police officer, with the approval of his superiors, killed more than 30 street dogs in his native village, shooting them for fun in his spare time.

69. Omsk region
An employee of the criminal investigation department of the transport police set fire to the building of the regional prosecutor's office in order to destroy the criminal case against himself.

70. Republic of Altai
The policeman forged 19 statements and receipts, embezzling 40,000 rubles, which were supposed to pay rewards for voluntarily handing over illegal weapons.

71. Republic of Buryatia
Out of anger, the policemen smashed a tractor with a sledgehammer, the driver of which did not stop at their request, and fled the scene of the crime.

72. Republic of Tuva
A drunk policeman from Kyzyl entered a boarding school for orphans, beat four teenagers for no reason, and then hit the teacher several times on the head with a metal bucket.

73. Republic of Khakassia
Abakan patrol officers stopped a random car, forced its driver to collect wild cannabis, and then tried to prosecute him for distributing drugs in order to extort a bribe.

74. Tomsk region
A policeman "because of domestic stress" beat a patient of a medical detoxification center to death, shooting him in the anus with a traumatic pistol.

75. Amur region
The policeman of the pre-trial detention center of the city of Tynda in his lunch break robbed a bank.

76. Jewish Autonomous Region
The policemen who accompanied the Khabarovsk-Chegdomyn train deceived 16,000 rubles from ten Koreans who did not speak Russian.

77. Kamchatka Territory
The traffic police major, having deliberately dispersed his jeep on the pier, flew into the Pacific Ocean and died.

78. Magadan region
A drunken policeman raped a woman on Victory Day until she died.

79. Republic of Sakha (Yakutia)
Police squad leader special purpose organized a cordon so that thieves could safely commit theft

80. Primorsky Krai
The policemen of the Nakhodka patrol service spied on the PIN code bank card when its owner withdrew money from an ATM, and then secretly stole it from the victim and cashed it out.

81. Sakhalin
The policeman, fearing for his life, twice, without aiming, fired from a traumatic pistol at a group of young people who threw a snowball into his car, and knocked out one of their eyes.

82. Khabarovsk Territory
The captain of the transport police demanded that the fishermen give him the entire catch of smelt, and when they refused, he tried to steal 210 kilograms of fish alone.

83. Chukotka Autonomous Okrug
The policeman fabricated false receipts for paying for hotel accommodation and tried to get money from them in the accounting department of his police department.

All reports of crimes are dated back to the 2000s. Sources for each specific case can be easily found on your own through a Yandex news search.

It is good to steam in the sauna after the piercing cold of the morgue, inhaling the aromas of juniper and sandalwood. It's nice to see alive, full of health, joyful faces. Green tea with jasmine sets in a positive, calming mood and the head becomes light, as if thoughts follow a faint smoke of smoking incense. The gaze is relaxed and lazy, moving from passing bodies to motionless objects and back, thoughts sluggishly trail behind, as if bypassing the line beyond which a change in worldview occurs ... Each woman smells differently, but, despite age, size, hair length, weight , eye color or occupation, many smell like something similar ...

There are well-built, bright, well-groomed ladies, but for some reason they shy away from them all the time - any fragrance they exude has a final note of the smell of carrion. These are bitches. They don't have a middle ground. Prefer all or nothing. They always play all-in, start bravo, manipulate to the point of insanity, live happily, but not for long, die ugly.

And then there are ladies-gray mice. Study, career, society - not for them. They ripen early, choose for a short time, marry late, and as a rule - "by aerial". They are beaten by drunken husbands, they are abandoned with children in their arms, they have no housing, no education, no profession. They are mothers if they understand and develop their mission. Then they smell like milk and bread. These smells of childhood accompany them until old age. Or incubators for offspring, if they don't understand. Then they smell of laundry soap, they even live in apartments as if in a garbage dump, eat leftovers, walk around in rags. They don't have well-being because they don't know what it is and what to do with it.

There is also a special smell in ladies blue stockings, notorious and limited by internal frames - they smell of old, unventilated, moldy housing, from which you want to leave as quickly as possible.

There is a certain category of ladies who have a little bit of everything - brains, efforts, experience, desire, talent. At school - threesomes, at home - sluts, in relationships - ostentatious, in any structure - gray ballast. They smell of toilet water - from the toilet to Oriflame. At first, a sharp stupefying smell, then it dissipates without a trace and nothing reminds of the former purity.

The smell of women-ladies is very special. A clean, thin, elusive, but persistent trail remains on everything they touch. As precious stones (an inapplicable attribute of aristocracy), they have an inner value and a worthy outer frame. They may not necessarily be high-born, blue-blooded and of a special breed, but always very intelligent ladies - retired rural teachers, and young creatures with pigtails, and a business woman in an elite bank. Living with them every day is as difficult as sniffing the neck of a bottle of real perfume. But, like an expensive perfume, they are good only in drop doses and at a distance...

Original D. Rodari:
(translated by B. Zakhoder)

What do crafts smell like?

The bakery smells of burnt muffin...
The butcher smells of rotten meat.
The oven smells like carbon monoxide.
The milk jug smells of sour sour cream.
The miners smell of burning methane.
The newsboy smells like a dead duck,
As a perfume department - a prostitute.
The surgeon smells of unsuccessful anesthesia.
The milkmaid smells of evening manure.
Furrier smells of flayed skin.
Vacuum cleaner... You know how.
The cook smells of sour cabbage.
The nurse smells like an enema.
Mother-in-laws usually smell like pancakes
Everything at customs is big money.
The party member smells like red flags.
Babysitter smells like Huggy's diaper.
The shoemaker smells like thick shoe polish,
A popular singer - cocaine.
The English consul smells like oatmeal,
The school teacher reeks of valerian.
It smells like a stale soldier's boot.
It smells like a hot brother iron.
The rheumatic smells like ozocerite.
The lover of jerks smells like dynamite.
A tourist smells of sprat in a tomato,
Iodine with brilliant green - an athlete climber.
The priest smells of holy water.
The rabbis smell of kosher food.
The radio operator smells of Morse code.
And heroin is a smuggler.
A sailor smells like spilled oil.
Only programmers... don't smell at all

What does Art. Lebedev Studio smell like...

Coders smell like jasmine and spruce.
Accountants smell like the fifth Chanel.
Returning tired from negotiations
The manager smells like white sandalwood.

Designers smell like wood with leather
And art directors smell the same.
If you sniff the technologist's neck -
The technologist's neck smells like sage.

Tobacco smoke, grass and absinthe
Smell satisfied with the site customers.
"Santos" smells like a studio cat
(Someone sprinkled the animal a little).

With unfading daring strength
Voronezhsky smells like fresh tequila.
(You can sniff the display: subtly
Even the icon smells of tequila.)

Leaning over a press release at night
The press service of the Brown Forest smells.
Delicious, quiet and ghostly-secretly
The studio smells of industrial design department.

Lebedev just does not smell at all,
Gloomy looking at this mess.

To the last day of the system administrator))

It smells like yesterday's shop noodles,
An unfed cat, a two-day stubble
Untidy toe, expired vodka,
Coffee grounds, burnt wiring,

It smells of Soviet, centennial, vigorous
Triple and murderous cologne
Paper wrinkled and dusty floppy disk,
Four hundred and forty-eighth cigarette,

But still naive and pristine
Our sweet and kind fellow programmer,
When a mine is drawn next to him
A little offended sysadmin

Only programmers ... don't smell at all ?

“Only programmers don’t smell in any way,”
Only a fool would think such a thing.
"C" encoder smells like structure,
Visual Basic smells like hack.
C++ smells like polymorphism,
Oracle smells of bureaucracy,

DBA stinks with a tedious rally,
It smells like Main Frame, like an old Jew.
A web programmer smells like a random connection,
COBOL programmers smell of desperation.
PASCALshchik smells like something forgotten,
ACCESS developer - broken trough.

Together they all smell like a mess -
Testers just don't smell!
It is not true! Smell yourself
Testers always smell like bedbugs...
Just go to them and look around -
So some kind of beetle swarms.

Above the programmer, like a fly buzzing.
- It doesn’t work here, it doesn’t work there ...
Even the admin can not dismiss,
The smell of the beetle will cost him more.
Knowing neither the code nor the system,
Testers smell like a common problem!